Matrimony
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Please read all the sections in the Marriage section of our website before you call Rosa Jimenez, our Marriage Coordinator.
A wedding is a Sacrament instituted by Christ as a sign of unconditional love and permanent fidelity, in imitation of the way God loves.
All of us at the Basilica of St. Patrick’s Old Cathedral are blessed to be part of the preparation for your wedding.Parishioners:
When you place your first call and ask for Rosa, you probably will inquire about the availability of a specific date. However, before we set a date for your wedding in our calendar, Rosa will arrange for you both to meet with one of our priests to discuss the Sacrament of Matrimony and how your spirituality as a married couple relates to worship here at St. Patrick’s Old Cathedral. He will provide you with a copy of Together for Life, a booklet that contains the Rite of Marriage with the options for prayers and readings. He will also describe our bi-annual, parish-based preparation week-end called Three to Get Married (TTGM, (see details in the section on Pre-Cana/TTGM).
If either of you is non-Catholic, an application for dispensation form is to be signed at this time.
After meeting with the priest, Rosa will take a few moments to review all the steps you need to take. For instance, you need to obtain sacramental records and a marriage license. At this time, you may secure a date for your wedding with a $250 non-refundable deposit towards the donation of $1,500 due prior to the wedding.
When Rosa has received all the required documents and you have completed the Three to Get Married weekend, Rosa will schedule a second meeting for you to meet with the priest. At this meeting the priest will ask you ask you to sign a statement -The Pre-Marriage Inquiry - affirming that you understand Christian marriage as a solemn and unconditional covenant. He will also review the wedding ceremony so that we will be ready for your third meeting with him at the wedding rehearsal, usually scheduled the day before the wedding.
Rosa must receive your marriage license before the rehearsal date. It will be signed by bride and groom as well as two witnesses at the rehearsal.
If there is a visiting priest to witness your marriage, he must contact the Pastor of St. Patrick’s Old Cathedral at least six months before the ceremony (pastor@oldcathedral.org).
Steps – Parishioners- Call to meet with Rosa Jimenez, our Marriage Coordinator
- Meet with a priest from St. Patrick’s Old Cathedral
- Obtain your sacramental records for Rosa
- Sign up for Three to Get Married
- Secure a Wedding Date (a minimum of six months from the time you set the date)
- Meet with priest again to plan the Wedding Ceremony and sign the Pre-Marriage Inquiry.
- Deliver the marriage license to Rosa before the rehearsal date
- Wedding Rehearsal with the priest
Non-Parishioners:
When you place your first call and ask for Rosa, you probably will inquire about the availability of a specific date. However, before we set a date for your wedding, you need to acquire a Letter of Freedom from your parish priest stating that he understands that you will be married here. Once Rosa receives that letter she will meet with you so that she can describe your next steps. For instance, you need to obtain sacramental records and a marriage license. You also need to attend a Pre-Cana Course or participate in our parish-based preparation week-end called Three to Get Married He will also describe our bi-annual, parish-based preparation week-end called Three to Get Married (TTGM) (see details in the section on Pre-Cana/TTGM) $250 non-refundable deposit towards the donation of $1,500 due prior to the wedding.
After you have completed the Pre-Cana Course, Rosa will provide you with a copy of Together for Life, a booklet that contains all you need to know about the Rite of Marriage, for example the selections for prayers, readings and forms for the exchange of vows. She will also schedule for you to meet with a priest here to plan the wedding ceremony. You will meet him again at the Wedding Rehearsal.
Rosa must receive your marriage license before the rehearsal date. It will be signed by bride and groom as well as two witnesses at the rehearsal.
You will need to make an appointment with a priest from your home parish in order for him to sign a statement – The Pre-Marriage Inquiry – affirming that you understand Christian marriage as a solemn and unconditional covenant. If either of you is non-Catholic, an application for dispensation form is be signed at this time.
Steps – Non Parishioners
- Obtain the Letter of Freedom from your Parish
- Meet with Rosa Jimenez, Wedding Coordinator
- Obtain your sacramental records for Rosa
- Sign up for Pre-Cana or Three to Get Married
- Secure a Wedding Date (a minimum of six months from the time you set the date)
- Meet with your Parish Priest for Pre-Marriage Inquiry and dispensations (if necessary)
- Meet with a priest at St. Patrick’s to plan wedding ceremony
- Deliver the marriage license to Rosa before the rehearsal date
- Wedding Rehearsal with the priest
Parishioners getting married elsewhere
When you place your first call and ask for Rosa, she will arrange for you both to meet with one of our priests to discuss the Sacrament of Matrimony and how your spirituality as a married couple relates to worship here at St. Patrick’s Old Cathedral. He will provide you with a copy of Together for Life, a booklet that contains the Rite of Marriage with the options for prayers and readings. He will also describe our bi-annual, parish-based preparation week-end called Three to Get Married, (see details in the section on Preparation Sessions).
If either of you is non-Catholic, an application for dispensation form is to be signed at this time.
After meeting with the priest, Rosa will review all the steps you need to take. She will be gathering all the documents you need for the church where the wedding will be celebrated. It is important, obviously, that you secure a date at the church for your wedding.
The Pastor of St. Patrick’s Old Cathedral will write a Letter of Freedom to be sent to the church.
When Rosa has received all the required documents and you have completed the Three to Get Married weekend, Rosa will schedule a second meeting for you to meet with the priest. At this meeting the priest will ask you ask you to sign a statement - The Pre-Marriage Inquiry - affirming that you understand Christian marriage as a solemn and unconditional covenant.
Steps –Parishioners getting married elsewhere- Call to meet with Rosa Jimenez, our Marriage Coordinator
- Meet with a priest from St. Patrick’s Old Cathedral
- Obtain your sacramental records for Rosa
- Sign up for Three to Get Married
- Secure a Wedding Date from your church (a minimum of six months from the time you set the date)
- Meet with a priest from St. Patrick’s to sign the Pre-Marriage Inquiry and apply for dispensations (if necessary)
- Pastor of St. Patrick’s Old Cathedral will write the Letter of Freedom
- Rosa will send all relevant documents to church where the wedding will occur.
Wedding Day
Your Wedding should be secured at least six months in advance.
Weddings may be scheduled any weekday from 9:00AM – 7:00pm or on Saturdays, between 10:00AM and 3:00PM, and on Sundays between 2:30PM and 5:00PM (Weddings may be scheduled during Lent but not Holy Week).
A date is secured for a wedding only after we have received a non-refundable deposit of $100.00.
Ceremony
A booklet entitled Together for Life will be very helpful to you in planning your ceremony. It will contain the selections for all the prayers and readings.
The most basic decision about your wedding is whether or not it will be celebrated with a Nuptial Mass or with a Nuptial Ceremony.
Nuptial Ceremony
The Nuptial Ceremony is a beautiful rite that celebrates the sacred union of the couple through the exchange of vows in the presence of the Church. The ceremony includes:- Welcome and Opening Prayer
- Readings from of Sacred Scripture
- Homily (sermon) given by the presiding priest or deacon
- The Declaration of Consent & Vows
- The Blessing & Exchange of Rings
- The Prayers of the Faithful
- The Our Father
- The Nuptial & Final Blessing
Nuptial Mass
The second option for your wedding is the Nuptial Mass. It contains the same parts as the Nuptial Ceremony described above but also includes the Eucharistic Prayer and the reception of Holy Communion. We recommend the Nuptial Mass only when both spouses are Catholic and most of their guests attend Mass regularly.
If you are uncertain about choosing a Nuptial Ceremony or a Nuptial Mass, please speak with one of our priests before deciding.
Participation of Family and Friends
The Liturgy of the Word. You may select two persons to read who have experience or are at ease at a microphone. Their attendance at the rehearsal is important. Since the first reading is taken from the Old Testament, this reader may be Jewish. However, since the second reading is taken from the New Testament, the reader must be Christian.
Presentation of Gifts. Two people may be involved in presenting the gifts of bread, wine to the celebrant.
Prayer of the Faithful. Up to three people may participate in reading brief petitions. These can be found in Together for Life.
Unity Candle. Although not part of the Roman Catholic Rite of Marriage, some couples request that the lighting of a “Unity Candle” be part of the ceremony. This is permitted but not recommended since it is not part of the Catholic Rite of Marriage.
Music
Soon after you secure your wedding date, contact the Basilica’s Director of Music and Organist at organist@oldcathedral.org. He will send you the Basilica’s Wedding Music Guidelines.
More information on the Basilica’s magnificent 1868 Henry Erben organ and music staff can be found here: http://oldcathedral.org/music.
Keep in mind that all music within the liturgy must be sacred. Also, please note that music fees are in addition to your donation to the church, and must be paid in full well in advance of the wedding date.
TTGM or Pre-Cana?
Couple who are members of our Parish will want to attend the Three to Get Married Retreat (Friday night to Sunday morning) that is offered here at two different times of the year (October and April). You will certainly want to participate in this spiritually renewing experience to prepare you for one of the most important and sacred decisions in your life. Here is how you can obtain information on Three to Get Married - http://www.regnumchristinyctnj.org/index.php/events/couples/three-to-get-married/
Couples who are not members of the Basilica, may attend a Pre-Cana course at another location approved by the Archdiocese of New York (or your home diocese). You may ask Rosa for a brochure that provides the dates and locations where the conferences are held. This information, including the registration form, can be obtained by visiting the following web page; http://nyfamilylife.org/marriage-preparation . A Certificate of Completion must be sent to Rosa before the rehearsal is scheduled.